Storm assures me that Flat Iron Mesa Trail offers a bypass around each of its multiple terrifying obstacles. You might think that such assurances would be comforting. Before you jump to that conclusion, you should note that men define “bypass” differently than women.
Definition of a Bypass
A woman assumes that if there is a bypass, her husband will use that alternate route to avoid traveling over a steep, off kilter, rocky, narrow, cliffhanging, bone jarring section of the trail. A man defines an obstacle as a ploy to be used to lure your wife onto a “red” trail that she would otherwise avoid at all costs. Once at the bypass, the husband will scoff at the wife’s concerns and announce “this is not anything, I can handle this with both hands off the wheel.” At that point the wise wife departs the vehicle claiming the need to take videos/photos and takes the bypass on foot!
Flat Iron Mesa Outcome
Like so many adventures that I hate until I survive them, Flat Iron Mesa Trail was “fun.” Relive with me this exciting journey as Storm tests the limits of driver and vehicular abilities. In fairness Storm did take the bypass on the “Tilt-a-whirl” obstacle but has remarked at least once a day since then that if I hadn’t been so scared he is SURE he could have made it.